3 weeks after i got married, I started cheating on the love of my life??? And almost 2 years later I'm still doing it. I love two men now. And I devoted a blog to it.
Dear Moonlighting Mrs.,
If your husband is/was the love of your life, why did you begin cheating? And why so soon after getting married?
One idea to the reason you have fallen in love with two men is that you have a fear of committment. This fear may be subconscious and therefore you are not aware of this. If this is the case, the affair may provide a sense of freedom - a thrill and excitement. The reason you may have a fear of committment may be due to being abandoned by a parental figure as a child (such as divorce, death, seperation, etc).
If you want this behaviour to stop - you must be true to yourself first. The only way to have a lasting marriage is to be honest with yourself and your husband. You may not be ready to tell him the truth, but what you are doing is showing him little respect.
Blogging is a great way to let go some of the different types of anxiety and frustration this situation may cause. Journaling is therapy in itself. It may also be wise to talk to someone (if you are not already doing this), such as a Counselor, Therapist, Religious Counselor (such as Priest, Rabbi, etc), and/or another professional who is trained to talk with people. If you have not ever been to a therapist (or other Professional), it may be frightening at first - but is worthwhile in the long run. It takes many sessions to really begin to understand yourself and actions with the help of a therapist.
My advice is to decide what you truly want, and then go after it. In doing this, do not disrespect others by lying or cheating - instead be honest with yourself and the others involved. It may hurt in the near future, but in the long run you will feel better.
Dear Moonlighting Mrs.,
If your husband is/was the love of your life, why did you begin cheating? And why so soon after getting married?
One idea to the reason you have fallen in love with two men is that you have a fear of committment. This fear may be subconscious and therefore you are not aware of this. If this is the case, the affair may provide a sense of freedom - a thrill and excitement. The reason you may have a fear of committment may be due to being abandoned by a parental figure as a child (such as divorce, death, seperation, etc).
If you want this behaviour to stop - you must be true to yourself first. The only way to have a lasting marriage is to be honest with yourself and your husband. You may not be ready to tell him the truth, but what you are doing is showing him little respect.
Blogging is a great way to let go some of the different types of anxiety and frustration this situation may cause. Journaling is therapy in itself. It may also be wise to talk to someone (if you are not already doing this), such as a Counselor, Therapist, Religious Counselor (such as Priest, Rabbi, etc), and/or another professional who is trained to talk with people. If you have not ever been to a therapist (or other Professional), it may be frightening at first - but is worthwhile in the long run. It takes many sessions to really begin to understand yourself and actions with the help of a therapist.
My advice is to decide what you truly want, and then go after it. In doing this, do not disrespect others by lying or cheating - instead be honest with yourself and the others involved. It may hurt in the near future, but in the long run you will feel better.
Labels: Love-Advice
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