Dear Jill,
I am a first time "typer" to ANY advice column!
First, some backround....my sister's girl,"MY FAVORITE NIECE",has made us(my husband&I) very proud!As little as 5 yrs. ,my sister would put J. ,on a plane, to spend Summer with us ! WHEREVER...we were living!I thought we had a great relationship!
She(J) is now 31, a professor of English at a MA. college,married with a "handsome" baby boy!
As I do every year,visit with my sister ,a few weeks . Last year,baby was 2, I played with him,babysat him,sang ,danced & ate with him! A s000000 pleasant child!
When "we" were altogether,I "jested" about his pacifier,whined when he whined,& joked with him!
I went home......a month later ,I got a "reprimand"email from "favorite niece"!Stating ,I dented his self esteem ,etc ,by making fun of him!Also, she was "hurt" that I didn't spend MORE time with him!
Now, it is Summer ,again ,& my sister expects me to go up & visit her!
My heart is STILL paining from the total LACK OF RESPECT ,my niece showed me
I have tried to talk to her & explain my feelings & all I get is "Its water under the bridge"! BUT,,,,no other correspondence!!!
She used to type me EVERY time baby peed!!!!!!
I am hurt & uncomfortable to go face to face with her,,,,IF she even shows up at my sister's house while I'm there!
AM I "OVERREACTING"?????
"VERKLEMPTED" IN FLORIDA
Dear Verklempted in Florida,
I do not think you are overreacting at all. However, avoiding a problem won't help to make it better either. Confronting others is hard - but many people tend to feel better after all is said and done, whichever way the situation goes. Also this confrontation may help you in your own personal development.
This is your decision, and only you can make the decision - possibly a pro/con list will help? On one side you can think of good situations from visiting your sister. On the other side, you could think of any bad situations that may go down if you visit your sister and run into your niece.
Links that may help:
Pro Cons
Wikipedia Pro/Cons
Businessballs Pro/Cons
Good luck and feel free to write in and let us know what happens!
Love, Jill
I am a first time "typer" to ANY advice column!
First, some backround....my sister's girl,"MY FAVORITE NIECE",has made us(my husband&I) very proud!As little as 5 yrs. ,my sister would put J. ,on a plane, to spend Summer with us ! WHEREVER...we were living!I thought we had a great relationship!
She(J) is now 31, a professor of English at a MA. college,married with a "handsome" baby boy!
As I do every year,visit with my sister ,a few weeks . Last year,baby was 2, I played with him,babysat him,sang ,danced & ate with him! A s000000 pleasant child!
When "we" were altogether,I "jested" about his pacifier,whined when he whined,& joked with him!
I went home......a month later ,I got a "reprimand"email from "favorite niece"!Stating ,I dented his self esteem ,etc ,by making fun of him!Also, she was "hurt" that I didn't spend MORE time with him!
Now, it is Summer ,again ,& my sister expects me to go up & visit her!
My heart is STILL paining from the total LACK OF RESPECT ,my niece showed me
I have tried to talk to her & explain my feelings & all I get is "Its water under the bridge"! BUT,,,,no other correspondence!!!
She used to type me EVERY time baby peed!!!!!!
I am hurt & uncomfortable to go face to face with her,,,,IF she even shows up at my sister's house while I'm there!
AM I "OVERREACTING"?????
"VERKLEMPTED" IN FLORIDA
Dear Verklempted in Florida,
I do not think you are overreacting at all. However, avoiding a problem won't help to make it better either. Confronting others is hard - but many people tend to feel better after all is said and done, whichever way the situation goes. Also this confrontation may help you in your own personal development.
This is your decision, and only you can make the decision - possibly a pro/con list will help? On one side you can think of good situations from visiting your sister. On the other side, you could think of any bad situations that may go down if you visit your sister and run into your niece.
Links that may help:
Pro Cons
Wikipedia Pro/Cons
Businessballs Pro/Cons
Good luck and feel free to write in and let us know what happens!
Love, Jill
Labels: Family-Advice
